1: Any promises by pompous politicians to "get tough on crime"; we already pay around $500 per household to keep people behind bars. Let's try getting smart instead of getting tough for a change. 2: Related topic. Hysterical reports about ex-convicts committing nasty crimes. Yep, it happens. People who have no criminal records do nasty things also. I'd love to hear some reports about how many ex-cons are busy doing their jobs, paying their bills, and raising their children. 3: Any more poppycock claims that President Obama isn't an American citizen or that 90% of the people in prison are illegal aliens or climate change is a socialist hoax. 4: Detailed reports of the naughty bedroom frolics of politicians and preachers, followed by tearful proclamations of remorse. Persons of either gender who provide this fodder for unimaginative paparazzi should learn to say "none of your damned business!" or else keep their knees together or zippers up, as the case may be. The voyeurs among us can pay for their fix at the porn shop rather than relying on Fox News.
5: Anything that Richard Cheney has to say. 6: More obnoxious things that are going to happen to me the next time I travel by air. Thank heaven for my hybrid auto that gets 47 miles per gallon. 7: Jingle Bell Rock, Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree, Frosty the Snowman, and Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. I'd rather hear Silent Night 18 hours a day because it's easier to ignore. 8: Any statements that "Hurricane season is here again" or ". . . certainly going strong." 9: Any claim that we can't get a healthcare reform bill because a) it wasn't really bi-partisan b) somebody couldn't muster 60 votes, or c) some people still take Joe Lieberman seriously. 10: Which celebrity is adopting what kind of kid or high on which controlled substance or in jail for smacking a bed-partner. In the same vein, which reality "star" is in trouble with the law. 11: My wife may go into withdrawal, but actually, I'll be pretty happy if I don't hear any mention of a so-called reality show all year. My life and yours are reality; that stuff about jungles and islands is bullcrap.
What I would like to hear a lot more of this year is music with happy lyrics one can understand, people being polite to each other, more civility in our political processes, more meaningful discussions with only one person talking at a time on news shows, better performance for the stock market, wage earners taking home more and CEOs taking taking less, and in general, more love, less hatred, everywhere.
Those are my thoughts. How about yours?
(By the way, this year my performance in keeping to my resolutions was perfect. I did not break a single one. At the beginning of 2009 I firmly resolved not to have adulterous affairs with any supermodels, not buy any luxury yachts, not beat up any night club bouncers, not get too skinny, and not lift weights so much that I would strain my joints. I am so proud.)